Create the right paradox for your future self

Sometimes where we’re going we don’t need roads, we just need to start moving.

Everything we need to know we can learn from Michael J. Fox

In the Back to the Future trilogy, there’s an entire plot device about how going into the past the slightest thing will disrupt the time-space continuum and bring an alternate future. The story takes many twists when someone’s actions, by just being present in the past, start to alter the future. These twists open up new storylines and possibilities.

When the first movie came out, there wasn’t a second one planned. The runaway success of the first quickly changed that. These devices of infinite possibility allowed the filmmakers to build new storylines.

It’s not a new concept. We see this approach to time travel throughout all kinds of media on the subject, including ancient myths and religious stories, going back thousands of years (see Wikipedia on the subject to go deeper).

One thing in what seems to be more modern stories is the consistency that everyone is so worried about a wayward sneeze or smile in the past that will alter the state of the future significantly.

And yet, we don’t seem to think that the smallest things we do now can make so much of a difference to the future.

Little actions can have big changes

That’s why we are focused on the very small wins that add up over time. No one knows the one thing that can change the course of their lives forever, and sometimes it’s a lot of actions on one another, not just the one thing. The one thing opens the door, you still have to walk through.

Think about getting that dream job, or meeting a life partner. Neither of those situations are just being in the right place at the right time, but being in the right place at the right time many times. Showing up at work and solving issues, or being a supportive partner require consistency.

Marty’s dad punching Biff in the first movie is a great example of one action that begins to change the course of things. At that moment, Lorraine, his love interest, really notices him for the first time.

But that one action opened up an opportunity, it did not seal the entire future - there were other actions beyond that to shape the future. Marty’s father wouldn’t have been able to stop at that moment, he had to get to know his future wife, they had to setup a life, they had to make many decisions before Marty was born for the future to be what it was. Him standing up for himself shifted his life and how he operated moving forward.

The likelihood of us solving everything we need with one small action is so small, so let’s play the numbers game on this and have a bunch of small actions work on the spread of success.

Future me loves past me

Just starting something new is really difficult. It’s nice and warm in our comfort zones, aka the ‘known zone’. There’s not much mystery and there’s little stress in this zone, other than whatever is going on in the world.

Depending on what’s going on in the world, our ability to push outside our known zone and do something or build a new habit might be very low.

That’s ok. We have to protect our energy and sanity. Sometimes when things get rough, I break down things I need to do, or things that make life easier into the smallest of chunks.

Sometimes I do find, particularly in moments of despair about the world (gestures broadly), that setting myself up for a better tomorrow can be as simple as:

• setting up the kitchen to make coffee easily in the morning

• checking in on a friend I’ve not heard from for a while

• starting a draft of something when my brain won’t let it go

• messaging a few people in my network at the end of my day

• spending a few minutes doing some sort of household thing I’ve been ignoring

• prepping some food for the next day so I eat well

It doesn’t have to feel like I’m trying to put on a pair of soaked jeans all day long. I don’t have to shatter the earth, or affect it’s axial tilt. I don’t have to paint half the apartment or move all furniture. I might have to do some laundry, or take out the trash. Or write a quick message.

I ask myself “will future me appreciate this?”.

There’s a way to build confidence one short step, one shot, one burst at a time.

The upshot of taking the short shot

These short bursts don’t seem so taxing at the time, or at least most of the time. Sometimes stressing through reaching out to someone new is a very, very long five minutes.

But, from a numbers perspective, my brain knows that most of my short 5-minute bursts result in some sort of success.

Like the date clock in the time-hopping Delorean, I set a time to end at. I will use a timer on my phone for some of these things if I’m moving around. If I am at my computer, I use the alarm on the clock app. If I feel like I might want to do more than one short burst I use something like Pomodoro timer to chime at me and give me a break in between.

My brain has learned over time that this numbers game works to my advantage. I’m shooting shots I know I can’t miss to build up confidence. I’ve built some muscle memory around some of these things that I know make them easier to rely on.

• the more I reach out as a human being helpful, the more people appreciate it, so those are a bit less scary now

• the more I take a few minutes to understand impacts, or feelings, the better I am able over time to see patterns that can help me, my clients, and how I approach the world

• if I find ways to setup my tomorrow better the day before, I’m more likely to get into true focus mode, or be a bit more optimistic going into my workday

Need ideas to setup yourself for a better slice of tomorrow, what short shots you can take, and perhaps spread guidance, support, or help? Just message me.

Check out part two where we dig into how these actions can compound.

"If you put your mind to it, you can accomplish anything." - Marty McFly

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Just for the hell of it, here’s a clip of the first DeLorean trip. I makes me feel so young, and the effects are hilarious given today’s technology.